Department of Alcohol and Drug Prevention and Education - Help a Friend

Help a Friend

When is it a problem?

Any one of the items listed below represents unhealthy and perhaps dangerous behavior. A number of them together is a sign that your friend has lost control of her or his alcohol use. The most obvious of these are:

• Drinking to get drunk, or until passing out.
• Drinking at inappropriate times such as before class or before driving.
• Becoming violent, yelling, and fighting after drinking.
• Not doing well in school (missing class, not studying) because of drinking.
• Switching peer groups to find other heavy drinkers as friends.
• Having health problems, bruises and cuts, often getting sick.
• Experiencing blackouts or memory losses.
• Starting to use other drugs.
• Having a family history of chemical dependency.
• Experiencing changes in personality, a “Jekyll and Hyde” effect.

Helping a friend with a drinking problem

• Realize that your friend is negatively affected by alcohol and needs to change some behaviors. Be confident that your involvement is the right and caring thing to do.
• Don’t do it alone. Talk with someone else, preferably someone in the University Counseling Center, about your options.
• Talk with your friend. Make sure your friend sees what you see. Make sure your friend knows you have been affected as well.
• Be prepared for any number of responses. Stay calm and don’t take any negative response personally.
• If your friend responds positively, work with your friend to develop a plan.
• If your friend responds negatively, try again after the next instance of abusive behavior.
• If your friend's drinking habits do not change, set some limits for yourself.
• Get attention for your needs and your stress. This is a tough thing to go through. Get the support you need.